I tell people I’m busy and they say, “What else do have left? Isn’t it two weeks away?”
YES. Yes it is two weeks away, which means it’s all intensified. Here is a sample schedule:
Monday: Get up at 8 a.m., shower, get dressed, email a little, drive to Philly for 10 a.m. dermatology appointment, drive back down the shore, go to work at 2 p.m. followed by the gym until 11 p.m. Send email to bridal party about Spa Day at Waterclub in Borgata: It’s like Nirvana. So calming. Floor-to-ceiling views of Atlantic City. Hot tub, steam room, sauna . . .
Tuesday: Get up at 7 a.m., shower, email a little, mom’s BFF says Waterclub is too expensive, get dressed, drive to Philly for 9:30 a.m. summit meeting with mom, caterer, tent people, bathroom people, generator people, two party planners and a gardener at the reception site. Sounds like a lot of people and it was — but it was a great idea b/c all those people really need to be in collaboration.
The gardener, for example, said he had a way to get the bathrooms on the grass without destroying it. Brilliant. Ran from that meeting to a makeup trial at 11:30 and then back to work until 10 p.m. Email mom’s BFF back with the Water Club details trying to highlight $130 massages — it’s just *so* pretty there. Put finishing touches on Schedule of Events to send to Joel’s relatives when they’re in town — email them to parents. Get corrections.
Wednesday: I caught a rest. Phew.
Thursday: Woke up at 6:30 a.m., showered, emailed — mom’s BFF says, “No, those are body treatments not massages” — let Joel drove me to Philly — I was pretty wiped and very thankful — for 8 a.m. meeting with the Rabbi’s wife, an impromptu 9:30 meeting with the Rabbi and a 10 a.m. meeting with the photographer for which I felt really unprepared — I didn’t have any of my lists ready!! — then to work until 10 p.m. Exhausting. Go home, email, cave, tell mom we can just go to Adolf Biecker — she sounds really relieved. Good call. Make corrections to schedule of events.
Friday: Wake up at 10 a.m., make coffee on new Keruig (sweet gift from my coffee buddy and his wife) email bridal party about spa day, make a few phone calls for future columns, write column, email out schedule of events, go to work — home! WEEKEND.
Busy? Yeah, I’m still busy. I’m so busy and tired I’m really looking forward to our post-wedding life when we can go to Phillies games, have people over for barbeques and go on a date — that’ll be really fun.
I am often reminded of something my future sister-in-law said. She said the phrase “This is the best day of your life,” is overblown. “The best day of your life is the morning after, when you wake up with your partner next to you, you look into each other's eyes, smile, and say, ‘Thank GOD we never have to do that again,’” she said.
I hear that. I’ve seen that on the glowing faces of newlyweds; and I’m looking forward to *that* feeling.
I’m anxious to just relax into our marriage b/c wedding are a lot of work.
But, of course, as we’ll get to, marriages are work too. In that vein: My parents’ rabbi offered some really good advice:
Once a year, meet with financial planner so that money doesn’t become an issue between you.
Once a month, go on a date: Spend time that is purely romantic, no work, no housekeeping, just time.
Once a week, worry about all those other things — talk about everything you need to, big and small. Set aside a time every week to talk about whatever is going on, that way small problems don’t become big problems and big problems have a safe place to be aired.
Once a week, learn together: A marriage should be about learning and growing together — so, learn and grow together J
If you think I missed something — or have something to add — speak up! I’d love to hear your thoughts!!
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