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Have you been to the beach yet this weekend? It's a jungle out there.

Only instead of lions, tigers and bears, there are SUV drivers parallel parking at will, vendors hawking those neon rubber necklaces for the fireworks (at $10 a pop), children screaming over melted ice cream cones and ... gasp ... meter maids.

The Fourth of July isn't just about celebrating our country's independence. It's about surviving throngs of vacationers who descend upon the southern New Jersey shore for their annual summer stay. Just like the marines at Iwo Jima, you must learn to improvise, adapt and overcome - and get a tan while doing it.

Here are some tips for Fourth of July survival.

Map it out

Consider the New Jersey Turnpike, the Atlantic City Expressway and the Garden State Parkway off-limits. Hit Google Maps or pull out the old road atlas to find some alternate routes that won't leave you sitting in traffic for hours. For example, travelers heading east from Philadelphia can skip the expressway and take Route 55 south to Route 49 east for a scenic ride to Ocean City.

Prime parade positioning

Finding a good spot on the Independence Day parade route is key. Our recommendation: Park your camp chair in a shady spot near the beginning of the parade route. You get to see all the marching bands, dance teams and float queens before they start wilting in the heat, and you'll be in your car heading to the beach while everyone at the end of the parade route is waiting for the final float to cross the finish line.

Time the tide

Check the tide before hitting the beach this weekend. High tide in Atlantic City is about 6 a.m. Low tide is about noon. If you get to the beach at high tide, you could end up needing a compass to get from your blanket to the water in two hours. Then again if it's low tide and you park too close, you'll end up with a flood. Finding a good position is tricky, but necessary during a holiday weekend when the beaches are packed and there's not much room for late maneuvering.

Find a friend with a grill

Putting together a July 4 barbecue is hard work. You have to spend a small fortune on food, libations and decorations, clean the house, host the party and spend most of July 5 cleaning up. If you have a friend who's planning a backyard soiree, now is the time to cozy up and snag an invite. This way you get all the barbecue goodness without the hassle.

Permanent parking

If you find a parking spot at the beach, expect to stay there - indefinitely. Decent spots will be few and far between this weekend, so you'd better think twice before surrendering your space. Pack everything you could possibly need - changes of clothing, food, sand toys, camera, etc. - and be sure all of your intended destinations are within walking distance of the vehicle. And pack lots of quarters, lest you suffer the wrath of the meter maids.

Rain

Yes, the R-word is right there with other four-letter words you shouldn't say aloud. But if June taught us anything, it's Mother Nature likes to toy with our summer vacations. So far forecasts are calling for a sunny weekend with warm temperatures. But don't leave the house without some extra sweatshirts, jackets and towels. You never know.

Earplugs

While the adults are oohing and ahhing at the fireworks displays, some toddlers in the audience will likely be scared out of their minds by the loud noises. Earplugs, cotton balls, earmuffs - whatever does the job. Throw them in the beach bag as a precaution. You might not need them, but you - and the folks around you - also don't need a child screaming in fright, either.

Learn how the picture-in-picture function works on TV

For those not crazy about crowds, the best way to watch some July 4 fireworks is to tune in to the "Boston Pops Fireworks Spectacular" at 10 p.m. on KYW-TV 3 or "Philadelphia's 4th of July Celebration" at 7:30 p.m. on WPVI-TV 6. We recommend doing some picture-in-picture action at the end of the night so you can watch both shows simultaneously, and save yourself a headache of endless channel flipping.

Brush up on your history

Enjoy the burgers and fireworks, but take some time to brush up on your Independence Day history. Spend 30 minutes with your kids on a Web site such as kidsturncentral.com or kaboose.com to learn fun facts about the founding fathers and find some patriotic-themed games and crafts to do. After the fireworks, stay up and catch "1776" at 10:15 p.m. on Turner Classic Movies - nothing like mixing a little music with your history.

E-mail Courtney McCann:

CMcCann@pressofac.com

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